I made a terrible error the other day of speaking before I think.

My son was doing some coloring at the dining table and I was sitting beside watching him. Footywife and myself had noticed that over the past few months, his coloring skills had improved tremendously, especially in the area where he was supposed to “color within the line”. We were always lavishing praises on him for coloring well.

However in this instance, he seems to have lost a bit of confidence and did not seem to be in the mood to color well. He said, “I can’t do it”, referring to coloring within the lines.

In my enthusiam to encourage him, I said, “Com’mon, don’t give up”.

He immediately caught on the new phrase and said, “I want to give up“, and instantly stopped.

I just thought, “Fantastic… I had just provided that little bit of catalyst to promote despondence.” Hopefully it doesn’t create a lasting impact on him, but he had certainly learned a new phrase.

I just wished I had watched what I said.

theChildisKing wishes all readers, especially our Asian readers, a very blessed and healthy Year of the Tiger!

PS: Don’t eat too much junk! Remember, our kids will follow!

Yes, if you are a parent or a caregiver, regardless of whether you are a GOOD role model or not, your little ones will follow you. And children learn what they see. So be careful what you do in front of them.

My son, needless to say, is no exception. He likes to imitate the things I do. I think I have mentioned previously that I like to roam around the house without my shirt on, and so he follows.

• When I whistle, he asks me how to do it

• When he sees me work at home sometimes, he says wants to be an “office staff” when he grows up! (So much for my dream about him being a professional footballer!)

• When he eats, he chews them deliciously and noisily…just like me

• When I keep his toys, he continues playing!!! (ok, this one is different)

• When he sees me sweeps his toys using my feet, he does the same

This evening when I came back home from a cell group meeting and wanted to keep my shoes in the shoe cabinet, I saw his school shoes had already occupied “my segment”.

Need I say more?

Children learn by seeing what their role models do and aspire to be like them.

The role models’ behaviours are also their definition of what are acceptable and unacceptable behaviors. If you realize you are one, keep your chins up and be the proud and responsible caregiver. It is a joy when you see your little ones pick up the “good” stuffs from you

The Dad in the Mirror. This is the title of the book I am re-reading. There are so many little gems of fathering advice that I urge all dads to read it.

How often have we heard our children say, “Papa (Mama), I want to be like you”. I am sure most of us have. Of late, I have been hearing this sentence countless times from my 4-year-old son. When I roam around the house without my shirt on, he says he wants to do that. When he sees me sleep with just T-shirt and shorts, he wants to change from his long sleeve pyjamas and shorts too.

Our children yearns for a father figure to lead and to guide them properly. Too often than not, we dads (me included) are totally clueless on how to do so. We father for performance, rather than fathering the heart.

The first gem I got from this book is this, “..when children feel grace and acceptance from their father, their hearts grow strong with a love for GOD and others“. Ponder on this, it is a great piece of advice.

Recently we were helping our 3.5yr old son with his school homework (yes homework, my goodness!)

We were basically searching for items that start with the letters that were assigned for the given week.

Our little son has caught on a little of this “game” and started suggesting things that starts with the assigned letters. Of course he doesn’t know how to spell words yet. But the way he (and I suppose other kids as well) is learning is interesting and sometimes …cute.

An example is this declaration one day…”I know papa, scissors start with “C”!” (Get it? “C”sers)

We have a long way to go..:)

(written by Footywife)

Today while sending my little son to school we saw the principal (Mrs Tan) talking to a few other people.  We were waiting for the lift and the principal was talking to the few people just beside the lift.  They were speaking in Mandarin about some timing issue.

When the lift door opened we went in.  As soon as the lift door closed, my little son looked at me conspiringly and said “Mrs Tan was talking about Mrs Chee.”  Mrs Chee, by the way, is my little son’s form teacher.

I was most surprised by what he said.  I didn’t know what the principal was talking about but I was sure she wasn’t talking about Mrs Chee.  Besides she was speaking in Mandarin, a language which my little son struggles with.

“How do you know?” I prodded.

“Because Mrs Tan said chee” he replied.

Oh.  I was most amused by his revelation.  Before I could say anything, the lift door opened and my little son said goodbye and happily went into class.  Imagine if he had gone into class and told his form teacher that the principal was talking about her!  And his form teacher would probably believe him because as we all know, children don’t lie.

Yes, children don’t lie.  But they often misinterpret.

One of the DVDs I have at home is Madagascar (the first one).

We seldom play through the credits portion at the end of the show. But we did one day, and this was what happened…..

And here’s the REAL thing :

(written by footywife)

My little son loves role-play these days.

Most often he becomes Mrs Chee (his English teacher) and I am made to be Pan lao-shi, his Chinese teacher (Lao-shi is “teacher” in Chinese). Sometimes I am made to be Dominic (his good friend and classmate) or Javen Liew (another good friend and classmate).

It all sounds very trivia. Until I realized day-to-day events are “narrated” by him so easily during role-play.

I often had difficulty getting him to tell me about his school life – Was he happy in school? Were the kids physical? Did anyone smack him? Were the teachers harsh? Did they punish him unnecessarily (or worse, wrongly?)?… Yes – I’m a terribly concerned mother!

So role-play has become my avenue to find out about things that happened in school.

I just found out that children who jump in class are made to stand in a corner for 2 minutes (though I’m not too sure if it’s really 2 minutes). My little son (aka Mrs Chee) kept his eyes on the clock in the room and only allowed me (aka Dominic) out of the naughty corner after he was satisfied that 2 full minutes had passed (though he doesn’t have any idea what 2 minutes really means).

When I take on the role of “Mrs Chee”, my little son pays a lot more attention to me than when I’m just “mama”.

“I’m Mrs Chee now. Go brush your teeth Jadon. Quick, Javen Liew is next after you. Dominic has already brushed his teeth,” I said.

And my little son trots happily into the bathroom to do just that.

Though I’m not sure how long this will last.

It is a fact no one will deny, yet sometimes we fall into the trap of letting our children watch trash, and let them pick up unhealthy habits. I am guilty too.

We were at my parents’ place last Sunday for our weekly family dinner. My sister’s family was there too, and we were all either eating desserts, talking or watching a Taiwanese drama serial.

Then there was an interesting part of the serial where the wife of a character was brought to a flat where she caught her husband red-handed with a mistress. An argument ensued with the usual climax ending with the wife giving the mistress a tight slap.

No prize for guessing it right. My son immediately came over to me and gave me a slap and said,”I slap you like in the show!”

The Power of TV illustrated. Children Learn What They See & Hear.

(written by Footywife)

Lately my little son has the desire to “get inside the TV”.  It first started last week while he was watching Barney.

“Can you bring me inside there please mama?” he asked.

I was taken by surprise by that question.  “Why do you want to go in there?” I asked.  “Because I want three children,” he replied.  He meant he wanted to be the third kid in the show, as there were only two kids with Barney.

This week while he was watching Winne the Pooh & Tigger, he again asked, “Can you bring me inside there please mama?”

I asked him why and he said, “because I want to talk to them”.

“Oh, we can talk to them when they come to the shopping centres,” I said.  “We can’t go inside the TV because there’s nothing inside there.”

I then showed him the back of the TV.  “See, there’s nothing in there.”  I said,  “and Pooh, Tigger and Darby are not real people, they are fake.”

“How about me?” he asked.

“You?  You are real,” I said.

“No!  I don’t want to be real.  I want to be fake!” he declared, upset that he wasn’t the same as Darby or Pooh or Tigger.

Today, just before his nap, he told me “Mama I want you to buy me Darby but not the flat one.  But like us.”

I think he meant he wants a 3-dimentional Darby, not a 2-dimentional one like in the TV.

Or did he mean he wants a real Darby, not a fake one?!!