Here’s a common scene for most parents.
It’s a stormy and rainy night. The sky is flashing ceaseless lightning and roaring horrendous-sounding thunder every minute. The very next moment, your 6-year-old runs into your room looking for security.
“He’s already 6, it’s time he learns a bit of independence.”
“What if his younger brother sees him like that, surely that’s not a good example!”
“Havent we already explained to him countless times that lightning and thunder is nothing that he should to be afraid of?!”
And so with our rationale mind, we reprimanded his childish behaviour and shooed him off to bed, warning him not to disturb us again.
Of course that’s sounds pretty harsh and cruel, but we parents practise this to a certain extent. We may not speak as harshly, or may even cajole him in a very positive manner back to his room without letting him know how timid we think he is.
Let’s look at it from another angle. Our child ran to us looking for something. COMFORT & SECURITY. Did we provide that?
“But we provide comfort and security to him in other ways…”
True, but that is also one time where we DID NOT provide. And if we have taken the stance that he shouldn’t barge in every time the heavens open up at bedtime, chances are we would have denied him countless times.
What if we did let him come and join us in bed? Till how old do you think he will keep running to you on stormy nights? Till now, I have not heard of any 23 year-olds still running to their daddies and mummies for cover on such nights. My point is, let them come to us. They will grow up, but do you want them to grow up knowing you will always be there…..or not?
I choose to be a father of comfort and security wherever I can. That way, my son will grow to trust that I am there to protect and comfort him in times of fear, just as how my heavenly Father provides for me.